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Theology UCAS Examples

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Theology Personal statement

Some commendable content here, particularly in the first and last paragraphs. I have made a number of textual amendments, and it reads very well. Where I have indicated, you should add the titles of another couple of books you have read. You should also try to identify at least one aspect of contemporary theological issues that you discuss in your youth group - modern approaches to the Just War mght be a good one.

Good luck with your application.

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Theology Personal Statement

I have made a sizeable number of changes here, including in the order, to make the Statement flow more logically. I have beefed up the concluding paragraph too.

The main problem is that you say nothing very specific about your interests in Religious Studies. It is not clear from what you write whether this is a third A Level - you mention only English and History. To this end, I have pruned many of your sentences in ordto make room for some specific statements about subject-areas that particularly interest you - I have indicated in the text where this must be inserted. You could either mention one or to other books you have read or highlight particular topics in your RS study/research/reading. The focus should be on ideas that have interested or even surprised you.

I hope this is helpful. Good luck with your application.

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Theology UCAS Personal Satement

As it stood, this Statement was far too long. Lots of it was not obviously relevant to the application. The standard of English was also poor. It is important to realise that you are applying for courses in Philsophy/Theology and not in Psychology. I have spent a great deal of time not only shortening it, but also focusing it - in other words, it has been completely rewritten. The revised version is far, far better.

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